Sunday, 13 November 2011


I don't really know what to make of the past couple of days.

Yesterday wasn't good. All morning I was struggling to find a sitting position, with or without the sling, that eased the neck pressure. The only option that even partially worked was a very extreme one: turning the slung through 90 degrees and having my shoulder so 'abducted' that I was almost giving an inadvertent 'zeig heil' salute.

It was a bad day all over, and I was trying to rest and 'save myself' for today, because my sister was coming over with her kids. But when the neck pressure did finally go down a bit later in the afternoon, I couldn't resist using my arm more, as per the other day, and even did a few shoulder rolls in the shower. I was afraid I'd regret it today - last time I tried this, the next day was evil, but I just couldn't help myself.

But today's been good. I got up with it feeling pretty good - very little neck pressure, no noticeable pain. I couldn't decide whether to use the sling or not; last time I thought I didn't need it and so didn't put it on, I was in bed in agony by lunchtime. So I strapped it on, then used it or didn't, as the neck pressure seemed to require. It worked well, the neck pressure never did flare.

The big problem today has been my back -it's been pretty bad all day, possibly because of the lower-than-lately morphine levels yesterday. It got really bad after a short trip to the shops, so I've actually been in bed since about 2.30, and have needed quite a lot of pills. There's been some shoulder pain - not too much - but the neck pressure has never flared.

So I'm confused. Last time NP was OK and I did a lot, moved around a lot and used my arm a lot, the next day was terrible. Yet today was fine, despite yesterday's activity. When it took such extreme traction yesterday to get NP to go down, I thought that meant that the amount of traction required to get results would steadily increase, to the point that it was impossible to achieve, and so I'd be back at square one. But that's clearly not the case, because today I've needed little or no traction.

All of which currently suggests that my fear that my brain will find a way round my mechanical fix, so that it can continue to restrict the bloodflow and cause the pain, won't come true. I hope.

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