Last night was one of the worst I've ever had. I was forced to sit upright all night in the mother ship, because wherever and however I lay down, it immediately felt like my head was going to explode.

I tried every different configuration of pillows and ever arm traction setup that I could think of, and the neck pressure just got worse and worse.

Yet sitting up, with the sling on, was fine. So I ended up sat there, thinking about how shit I felt, all night long. I was desperate to sleep, but couldn't in that position.

I tried going back to bed about 5am and had the same problem, but eventually did manage to find a position where it eased slightly and I could drip off. Then I woke up feeling just as bad.

Bizarrely though, when I sat up with the sling, I felt fine - no pressure. I sat there all morning, feeling OK. I did various jobs and still felt OK.

It was only about 1pm that I had to stop, when the 'dislocate' pain exploded and I had to take a load of pulls and go to bed. I'm still there, and can't keep my eyes open.

The morphine is hitting me very hard today. Three hours after taking it, it's still strong enough that I'm shaking and I can't breathe or open my eyes. Yet it's wearing off enough to let the shoulder pain spike through like a sword.

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