Wednesday 31 August 2011

Out

This is how crap my life has become: I'm as excited and feel as adventurous as when I used to go to a foreign country on my own. And what have I done? I made it into the local town by myself for an hour.

It's the first time in something like six months that I've tried it.

It was so nice to be outside. The air smelt like autumn, it was lovely. It reminded me of cycling to school at the beginning of a new academic year. There were flower boxes outside, so in places it smelt like geraniums and verbena and all the stuff R and I used to put in our hanging baskets.

I managed to go into the health food store and stock up on the lactase tablets that allow me to eat lactose without being ill; the dates to blunt the taste of the Lofepramine and stop mr feeling sick; the ginger sweets that cut through the nausea when everything else fails.

Then I sat on a bench - not because I needed to, but because I wanted to stretch out the excursion.

Then I came home. My back is sore, my right eye feels like it's in the back of my head and I need the sling to stop my shoulder kicking off the neck pressure and screwdriver-in-the-eye. I will need to go back to bed soon, but for now I'm OK-ish.

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